Bowie was mad.
BOWIE: I want to know who did it.
Understandably so.
ME: Bowie, you don't know--
BOWIE: Bullshit! I want to know who did it!
Still, it was my job to keep the peace.
The boys and I were at Boone's house. It was supposed to be movie night, but apparently, since our last movie night, Bowie experienced a bit of drama.
BOWIE: More than a bit. Someone told that idiot Rich Tanner that I text his boyfriend when I feel like making out.
ME: Is that not true?
BOWIE: Of course it's true! But the only people I told about it were all of you when we had to do that stupid Sharing Circle!
Okay, it's not stupid. They did it on Oprah once.
BOONE: I didn't say anything. I don't even know Rich Tanner.
BRODY: I can't stand him. We don't talk.
BYRON: I wouldn't even--you know--I'm straight, so...
That's when I knew who did it.
Byron mentioned to me that he was hooking up with some guy with a boyfriend.
It must be Rich Tanner.
BOWIE: Well, now after I apologized to Rich, I look like a total joke because he found out after the fact about me and his boyfriend!
BOONE: Maybe you shouldn't have been fooling around with his boyfriend to begin with?
BOWIE: Maybe you should suck your own dick.
BOONE: Would that be bad?
BRODY: So wait, what happened?
BOWIE: I got defriended AND blocked!
BRODY: Ouch.
BYRON: That's really...wow...
Bowie's eyebrow went up. He must have smelled the fear coming from Byron.
ME: Why don't we all pick a movie? Something comforting to calm us?
BOWIE: Why don't you go fuck yourself?
ME: Hey!
BOWIE: Because of your stupid circle, I'm even more hated now that I was before.
BRODY: Who hates you?
BOWIE: All of Rich's friends.
BOONE: You made your bed--
BOWIE: Fuck you, Boone.
BOONE: Fine. Leave then.
ME: Boone--
BOWIE: Don't have to tell me twice.
Bowie took off. I looked at Byron.
BYRON: I vote for The Sandlot.
. . . . .
BYRON: Anyone?
Something tells me movie nights are going to be a hard sell from now on.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment